Last Sunday after church and a nice leisurely breakfast, Kathy and I sat down to read the Sunday paper. Ned was on his tower asleep. Molly took off to her secret place to get some rest for herself. All was right with the world.
Suddenly it started. At first I thought I was hearing things…a buzz in the distance. Then it got louder and I knew, the lawn mower brigade has begun. One neighbor starts. Another joins in and then a third starts. It’s a game to see who gets their grass cut first and makes every other yard look unkempt. Lawn wars have started.
Then there is me. I refuse to be drawn into this battle much to my neighbor’s chagrin. Some of them mow their lawns twice a week. I wait until I feel it needs to be cut or if I know a cat can get lost in the grass.
It is not that I don’t like cutting the grass, I do. It is mindless and you can see what you have accomplished when you finish. The thing is, I hate mowing down flowers. My yard is full of such pretty yellow flowers that over time become white and fluffy and get carried on the wind. I know that my neighbors are jealous because their yard doesn’t have as many pretty yellow flowers as mind.
I know that they put their heads together and wonder how I can cultivate such a bountiful flower garden with seemingly so little work. I can see in their eyes that they want to ask me how I do it. There really is no secret…it’s just a talent. I know, maybe some night I will go out, dig up a few of my pretty yellow flowers and secretly plant them in my neighbor’s yard. They would be surprised and thrilled to see that their yards look just as colorful as mine.
While I’m at it I might also share some brown patches with them. These, I feel, add character to a yard. Think of the fun people can have talking about what they see in the brown patches. It would be just like seeing animals in the clouds but they wouldn’t have to strain their necks looking up to the sky.
Wait, what is Kathy saying? Lowe’s is having a sale on Scott’s lawn products. They have weed and feed. They have grass seed. I guess the season of yard work has begun. I can’t help but think of my neighbor’s disappointment if my pretty yellow flowers disappear.
arjeha 
This made me laugh! Those lovely yellow flowers and their transformation into enchanting white ones is such a special event – why miss out on that?! I like your philosophy of lawn care.
My husband would not like to have your yard near his. He’s one of those twice a week mowers. Disparaging remarks are made about those who cultivate those yellow blossoms. However, I do love your sense of humor!
Ha – this is great! “The lawn mower brigade,” “pretty yellow flowers that over time become white and fluffy and get carried on the wind” – love your perspective! 🙂
This really made me laugh. I know that their should be pride in ownership but some people do carry it to an extreme.
I laughed out loud!! I had my husband read this. We, too, have a beautiful yard with pretty yellow flowers and a few brown spots. Thanks goodness that Mr. Wipple, next door, moved last year. He mowed…sometimes three times a week. We have too much to do to be obsessed with our yard…plus, the deer eat any flowers I put out…and the hostas! I like it to look somewhat neat….but to be a welcome to the little creatures that want to visit us. Thanks for the laugh…and don’t work too hard out there. 🙂
Love it! Hubby & I are of the same belief. God put it there, so it will stay. Of course, living in the woods had a distinct advantage over living in town. However, our neighbor across the road is constantly mowing, weeding, watching, watering, etc. etc. etc.
Love those “lawn wars”! And what I used to think was also funny was that the men in the neighborhood wanted to talk to my husband about “lawn this” & “lawn that”. He really cared very little about any of it; I was the lawn person. I’m happy you have those pretty little yellow flowers-a true sign of spring too!
I am so glad I don’t have to worry about the lawn! The only time (translate: from mid-June to end of September) I hate grass is when it wants to crawl into my flower beds. Maybe someone will write lyrics to the lawnmower beat!?!
“I wait until I feel it needs to be cut or if I know a cat can get lost in the grass.” this line made me really laugh, I now live in a non neighborhood in the woods, with no competition over lawnmowing, You can’t see us till you drive in. . .heaven, 🙂
Fellow Slicer, Amy
Tis the season – bah humbug! I am glad mowing is my husband’s job. I love the idea of the lawn wars. Sounds like a book title!